Not Again! The Butt Crack Chronicles Revisited

Hello my Dear Friend... I’m SO delighted to be feeling much better and filling your cup once again!  Today’s brew is a delicate blend of, ‘Just say no! mixed with Do you know what you look like from behind?’ to fill your cup...

Just before I got this wicked cold, I went to the market to buy lots of ginger and garlic to put into a pot of chicken soup... Littlest had the sniffles and I was hoping the soup would not only help her out, but maybe keep the entire family from getting sick as well.  My Grandmother believed in the magic powers of ginger and garlic to help keep our bodies healthy during the cold season... so I was on my way to the store to purchase some of this magic.

This should be an easy peasy errand... go to the market, get ginger, OH, looky here, the garlic is right there next to the ginger... let me get one more box of chicken broth, just in case... now off to the checkout counter. 

Standing in line I couldn’t help but observe the Mommy with her stroller directly in front of me.  Nothing strange and unusual about that.  I noticed that she used the underneath of her stroller to place her items in, instead of using a cart.  Yep, I used to do that all the time too, especially when you only have a few things to purchase.

And then she started to bend over to retrieve her goods... OH  NO  SHE DIDN’T!!!  It was deja vu and I was back in the Target parking lot with Littlest in tow. 

 Shock took over my body and my vision must have been temporarily impaired as I stood behind her perplexed... Am I looking at Joe the Plumber’s twin sister?, or worse... his wife?  And now they have a little one in the stroller that will one day be showing off his crack in the 'rear' future to the horror of the many who will stand behind him... Why yes, yes I did see Joe and a good three... THREE inches of crack staring back at me and my garlic!!  

My body was motionless, yet my mind was screaming into a megaphone... STOP!  PLEASE!  You only have 4 items, can’t you take them all out at once?  What?  NO, not again!!  You’re ruining my lipstick! 

Her crack-a-lantern was within an arms reach of me and if I were playing for the LA Lakers, I could have slam dunked my garlic cloves right down the middle and I could have earned extra bonus points for fitting the ginger pieces in as well... Double the points for the box of chicken broth!

Unloading these 4 items seems to take her forever and I don’t even know if I’m still breathing... I think.... I think.... I think the magic powers of the ginger and garlic I was holding in my hands was not working, and I soon realized there are limitations to what ginger and garlic can ward off.  I don’t think this was the type of magic my Grandmother was referring to!

Well Darling, I must be feeling better to fix you a cup like this!  Refill?  No?  I guess you’re right, I don’t want another cup either.  Before you leave, I must do my duty as any good Mommy would... turn around, bend over... phewww... okay, you’re good!  Until next time my Dear Friend... watch out for unsuspecting cracks in your daily activities... TaTa!