Short Shorts & The MILF Who Wears Them

Hello hello my Darling Friend... I’m absolutely delighted that you are here!  Come sit, I’ve brewed a fresh pot of ‘Who thinks that’s a good idea?’ to fill your cup...

I’m a MILF.  Uh huh, I am because I said so and words are powerful so if you believe it than it is... so I do and I am.  Oooh, I am just soooo confident!  Love that about moi!  And you should see me with a shimmery mauve on my pretty pucker, the whole room stops in their tracks... meee modest?  Never!

Ummm, Caffe?  What’s in your cup today?  What Darling?  My cup?  OHhh... yes, I uh... I was wanting to chat about the people who design little girls clothing and dressing them up like MILFs but it wouldn’t be MILFs it would be more like miniature Hoochie Mamas and I started going down the path of being a MILF and I got all lost talking about myself because I just adore talking about myself and... 

WAIT A SEC!  I wanted to talk about me being a MILF, did I do that?  YES Caffe you did!  Okay, good, because my point was, I can be a MILF but I don’t want to purchase clothing for my Littlest that I would purchase for myself because the clothing I buy is to entice my Hubby and I don’t think the clothes that are made for young girls are age appropriate and should be... enticing?  That’s what I wanted to say.

Littlest needs some new shorts for summer.  Okay, we can do that... off to the store we go.  Do you know what we found when we got there?  A collection of shorter than short shorts, shorts that looked like mini Daisy Dukes, shorts that were ripped up with holes in all the wrong places, and shorts that my Littlest said, “Why wear shorts?  You might as well just wear a bikini bottom!”  

Who designs these clothes and what were they thinking?  It’s bad enough to see short shorts on a Mommy that really shouldn’t be wearing them *see photo above* and then to see it on a 9 year old girl is just as jaw dropping that they are even allowed out of the house wearing that!  Yes, yes, everyone is different and it’s okay for some... but what is appropriate anymore?

Am I so wrong to want kids to look like kids, and to not have them wearing clothing that makes them look like a mini version of Katy Perry?  Yes, I know my Darling, I’m talking about shorts and only shorts and I kind of am overdoing it a bit... BUT, I’m not comfortable letting Littlest wear itsy bitsy teeny weenie shorts!  Maybe I’m old fashioned, I just don’t think it’s a good idea... for her not for me.

Oh looky, my cup is empty and I need to get back to the shopping mall... I saw the cutest little pair of short shorts... I mean, umm, shirts or uhh shoes... *Ahem*  Until next time my Dear Friend... Ta Ta!

Klout? Is That A New Lipstick Color?

Well Hello my Dear Friend... Happy to have you here!  Come in, sit... make yourself comfy... I’ve had several requests over the past few months from new Mommy bloggers wanting me to explain some of the different social media sites that are online and if any of them are worth using to help with their blogging presence.  Hmmm... I think I need to fill our cups right about...      NOW!

There are sooo many social media sites that I don’t even know where to begin... kind of like when I’m at the cosmetic counter(s) at Nordstrom’s and sitting in front of me are at least 100 different shades of lipsticks and that’s just one brand and right across is another... What?  I’m doing it again?  But I’m a lipstick fiend!!  Doesn’t social media and lipstick sound the same?  Oh, all right... 

Social sites, lipsticks, social sites... hmmmph!  Yes, yes, I’m starting... I’ll cover one at a time and today’s post I’ll start with a site you may have heard of, but maybe not so much, Klout.  Have you heard of it my Dear?  Yes, no, it’s always good to have some kind of knowledge about the different sites.  I say some kind, because Darling, that’s about all you’ll get out of this MILF! 

Klout is an online sheesh Darling, of course everything is online! rating site that rates your online influence.  Did that make sense?  That made about as much sense as blue eyeshadow and bright red lipstick... none at all!  HA!  Okay, back to my nonsense explanation about Klout... The scale is from 1- 100, 100 being the very tops and if you are the very tops,  it means you live online 24 hours a day and have no life which would be horrible because than you would never be able to buy more lipsticks EVER!  I mean, me buy more lipsticks... buy more lipsticks?  Gee, mention lipsticks and I start getting fidgety... now, hurry hurry... lipsticks are calling me...

So how does your Klout score go up Caffe?  I have no idea Darling!  lol  I’m serious!  Some little gnome comes out of Googleland and deems you Klout worthy and then your score goes up... Like I said Darling, it’s all in how much time you spend online and interacting with others, that I do know.  Oh, one more thing, if people like you, they give you what’s called a K+ in whatever topic that you’re influential about.  And of course I’m most influential about being a MILF and a lipstick fiend and does Klout have that as a topic?  NOoo!  Hmmmph...

Is Klout worth using as a Mommy blogger?  Well it depends my Dear... if you plan on monetizing your blog, then becoming a member of Klout would probably be a good choice especially if you’re trying to make a presence for yourself online.  There are businesses that actually take a looksy to see if you have a Klout score if they plan on doing business with you.  It’s not an end all if you choose not to become a member, but it does let future prospects know what kind of influence you have online in a round about way.  Round about way?  Yes, round about, because not everyone uses Klout.

So there you have it... short cut 101, kind of sort of explanation of Klout by Caffe... better than reading the whole darn TOS page!  Next up... Which lipstick color would be best when visiting Facebook... HA!  Made you look twice... Have a FABulous Day my Darling Friend!  Until next time... Ta Ta!

Celebrate Our Freedom!

Happy Birthday America!  My Cup is Up!

**This FABulous picture of Old Glory was taken by my Darling Friend Christine**

Yea for Friday!

Have a YUMMY weekend Darling...  xoxo

Cups Up! Quote of the Week...

"God gave women intuition and femininity. Used properly, the combination easily jumbles the brain of any man I've ever met." Farrah Fawcett 



Is that why I can't understand the gibber that comes out of their mouths?  I MUST be doing it right then Darling...

Mommy? Tell Me About the Time You Slept With ALL Your Roommates...

Well Helloooooo my Darling Friend!  It’s been awhile now hasn’t it?  I’ve certainly missed your company and I know you’ve missed me too.  

Traveling from lipstick counter to lipstick counter has not been as exciting as I thought it would be... What??  Caffe not excited about lipstick shopping?... 

Well my Dear, I adore the lipsticks, it was the bad Mommy behaviors all around me that distracted me so!  Come make yourself comfy and let me fill your cup, I think it’s been too long since my last Mommy Lesson...

I don’t know what it is... I just can’t seem to put my finger on it.  Hmmm... bad decisions, neglecting to be consistent, or maybe it’s just a lack of education.  I’ve been searching high and low just like my quest for unleaded lipsticks for a reason as to why parenting has become... ummm... well... parenting just sucks nowadays!  There, I said it and I’ll probably get hate mail on my first day back!

What happened to the days that what Mommy says goes?  Where has the strength of saying, “NO!” gone?  Why are others so quick to judge a Mommy who is actually disciplining her child?  Who are all these so called child rearing “experts” and if they are an "expert", shouldn’t they have at least ONE child?  Don’t get me started on these "experts" who have never experienced waking up in the middle of the night to a crying baby to change a poopy diaper, and then change it again because in the middle of the change, more poop came out of baby’s behind and your eyes are bleary because you’ve been doing this every 2 hours for the last month!  

Hmmmph... my lipstick is starting to smudge and I’m going down the wrong path as I often do!  Now Darling, I’ve had a bit much caffeine and I’m so irritated with the ridiculous behaviors that almost resembles... do I dare say it?  Well of course I’ll say it...   

Parenting today resembles reality TV shows!  

Think about it, one of the very first popular reality show that came on TV was... come on, you know the answer... The Real World.  Believe it or not, TRW has been on TV for 28... twenty-eight, TWENTY-EIGHT seasons!

We can say that reality shows are make believe and scripted all we want, but after 28 seasons (or about 20 years) of “reality” becoming less and less so, and it’s now more about how outrageous the show can be, does outrageous seem normal to most now?  It’s a thought, and this just might be the answer I was looking for.  Can the bad parenting of today be connected to the “reality” of TV shows that have taken away the standards of what it means to be a moral and ethical person?

I think I should ponder this question on another shopping spree...   

Well off you go, I'm headed to the nearest lipstick counter to smooth my irritation with a little color as this conversation has frazzled me so!  Until I get back from my next purchase... Ta Ta my Dear Friend!

You Can Find Me in the Lipstick Aisle...

Oh!  Well Hello my Darling... I didn’t hear you coming, you caught me by surprise!  That’s okay, it wasn’t like you caught me in my lace undies looking at myself in the mirror again... Come on in, I’ll brew us a fresh pot to fill our cups...

You know my Dear, I’m simply delighted that you stopped by.  It has been a zoo around my household lately and the day turns to night as quickly as I can reapply my favorite lipstick.  No Darling, I haven’t forgotten you, and you know you’re in my heart always.

I’ve been thinking... oh cut it out, I won’t get you into trouble this time... though you have to admit, getting into mischief with moi can be quite exhilarating!  Think of all the lovely neighbors that would admire our precision work decorating their trees and shrubs with TP!  Ahhhh the memories...

Now, what was I saying again?  OH... thinking.  Yes, I’ve been thinking about this little piece of web space known as Caffeinated OC Mommy and I think... I think... I think I’m going to take a little break and go on a mission.  A mission Caffe?  Yes a mission Darling!  I’m going to travel around to exotic locations looking near and far for the most delightful lipstick counters from all the little boutiques to the big boxed shopping malls!  What kind of mission did you think I meant?

I say there’s no time like the present, so I’ll start today!  I won’t be back until I have searched every counter at every store looking for the beautiful colors that I soooo long for... and when I’m done, I’ll return refreshed with a whole new collection of bold, shimmery stories lipsticks to quench your my desires!  Oooooh, I better get started...

So off you go, but before you leave... Cups Up! *clink*  TaTa for now my Dear Dear Friend!  xoxo

P.S. If you start to get Caffe withdrawals... you can always follow me and my random thoughts over on Facebook or Twitter.  You can find the follow box thingys over there ---------------->

3 Day Weekend? YIPPEE!!

Hello Darling!  Are you gearing up for a FABulous weekend?  I sure am and I need to make sure that my best lipsticks are sitting right next to my mirror... I need them handy for whatever adventure comes my way. Be safe, have fun, and I'll see you after the holiday weekend... Cups Up!  xoxo

Cups Up! Quote of the Week...

“I always take life with a grain of salt, …plus a slice of lemon, …and a shot of tequila.” - Unknown






I prefer lime Darling...

Cups Up! Quote of the Week...

“I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.”  Marilyn Monroe

Take me and ALL my lipsticks!!