Hello my Darling Friend... Have I got a treat for you! Come make yourself comfortable and get ready for a fresh brew, and I mean fresh as in fresh perspective, fresh attitude, fresh, fresh, fresh and did I mention fresh? to fill your cup...
I found my Dear Friend Cherie over at BSN as the title of her post caught my eye... I, Cherie Jamison, Do Not Like Children. How could I not check out what this ILF (you like that? She’s not a Mommy so you know Darling... I took off the M. It’s only fitting...) is talking about? Why would she write such a thing? As I started to read her post the light bulb went on and it was as bright as my brightest shade of pink lipstick. What I read, made me SO proud of her! She’s already doing Mommy Lessons and doesn’t even realize it! She’ll be a good Mommy one day...
Howdy y'all. My name is Cherie Jamison and I hail from Pink-Nightmare.Com. I'm just a snarky college student trying to avoid the pitfalls that tend to be mandatory for adulthood. I'm not a mommy blogger, mostly because I feel like kids would cramp my style. That's not to say that kids aren't great.. for some people. Motherhood has certainly not cramped the style of Caffeinated OC Mommy, who has so graciously allowed me to guest post my own reasons for why kids just simply aren't for me.
Anyone who is a mother or father may want to clobber me for this, but hear me out before the witch hunt begins.
I used to love babies and small children. When I was in elementary and early middle school, I loved volunteering at church to work in the nursery. I loved playing with my nieces when they still lived in town. I could play with them all day, every day, and I still wouldn't be sick of them.
But over the past couple of years, something changed. Now, other than my nieces (who are older except for one), I really can’t stand to be around children. Which begs the question of why I decided to do nursery work again for my Christian service*.
I’ve developed a pretty solid hypothesis about why it is that I suddenly do not like children. It is composed of two parts: A) I’ve somehow lost the ability to put up with crap (both figuratively and literally) and B) it’s not the kids – it’s the parents.
A. I've somehow lost the ability to put up with crap.
I’m not a patient person. At all. I’m pretty sure I used to be a patient person, but somewhere within the last five or six years, that all went out the window. I’m not sure if it’s the fact that my job at Pizza Hut has made me bitter toward all of mankind and thus I am no longer programmed to deal with annoyances.
And let’s face it. Small children are full of annoyances. Sure, they are cute when they are laughing or learning to talk or saying the darnedest thing, but they also love to scream, kick, throw fits, and are pretty much constantly set to ‘play’ mode.
I just can’t do it anymore.
B. It’s not the kids – it’s the parents.
I really think parents today play a bit role in my inability to watch a child without popping three Excedrin. Back in my day, parents disciplined their children and actually put in the effort required to teach their kids right from wrong, how to use the “big boy” toilet, etc.
I was potty-trained by the time I turned two years old. Now, it’s totally not uncommon for kids three and four years old to still be poo-pooing and pee-peeing in Luvs.
The problem with parents today is that most of them put their own busy schedules ahead of advancing their children. Kids don’t know how to behave. Parents are too lazy to put in the time necessary to discipline. When I misbehaved, I knew that I would get a good old fashioned whippin’.
If parents aren’t comfortable with physical discipline, then there are myriad of other options. But when you just threaten to spank or to take away the computer, kids catch on to the game. You actually have to have follow through. A ten minute time out does no good when you let the kid up after three minutes because you don’t want to deal with it.
The result of no discipline is what I see on a regular basis today – kids running around with absolutely no respect. At Pizza Hut, we’ll have kids come in and play with the displays, try to run behind the counters, scream, etc. Would I have gotten away with that in my day? Hell to the no.
So, in conclusion, I’m pretty sure I’m not a terrible person. I’m pretty sure that outside factors contribute to why I really can’t stand children. But unfortunately for me, I have a good forty hours of watching little ones to deal with this upcoming semester. Lord help me, please.
* = Christian service is a required 20 hours of volunteer work than I have to do for school. Being a private, Christian university, they can subject me to such torture. It’s supposed to make you a more well-rounded person, but it just makes me bitter and angry. Reverse effect.
So there you have it... a fresh perspective from a future MILF. Leave her a comment and let her know that there really are good Mommys in the world and that you’re one of them. And if you’re so inclined to check out her blog, Pink Nightmare, she’ll give you a new view on what the 20 somethings think about life... sometimes we have to step out of our own cozy little bubble to see how others view the world we share.
Remember, we’re all in this together to make a better tomorrow and a better Mommy... Until next time my Sweet... Ta Ta!